The Gray Bunny (graybunny) wrote,
The Gray Bunny

Van Helsing

Our movie for the Sunday movie night was Van Helsing, which has been roundly denounced, including by people who should know better, as being bad. This betrays a terrible lack of perspective; having now seen the movie myself, the worst rating I can give it is Moderately Silly.

Consider that Van Helsing features:

  • Acting
  • Sets which are not someone's livingroom or the corner of a rented warehouse
  • Props which are not things found sitting around in said house or warehouse
  • Dialog which frequently sounds like things humans would say
  • Special effects
  • Cameras which are in focus

Trust me when I say that none of these elements is required to make a "movie".

My current gold standards for Bad are Invasion from Inner Earth aka They and Shaitani Dracula, both of which nearly defy description. Van Helsing is not even in the same league. It is also head, shoulders, waist, and knees above examples such as The Incredible Petrified World, Reptilicus, Monster a Go-Go, or The Nasty Rabbit. Or Frogs. Or Kingdom of the Spiders.

I could go on, but I think you get the idea. There are literally thousands of movies which can legitimately be labelled Bad. These days, genuinely Bad movies don't get into theaters, they go direct to video, except for some of the more wretched comedies. Movies with theatrical runs certainly don't have to be good, but even the lame and silly ones normally exhibit a level of competence which places them above the Bad.
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